January 7, 2004<\/p>\n\n\n\n
DEAR FAMILY:<\/p>\n\n\n\n
There were some days in the life of my brother, Wendy, that you may have missed , particularly grandchildren and others who had left home for college etc. Some events , you older brothers may recall and refresh and correct my memory.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
For starters it was Wendy\u2019s debut that Thanksgiving day. Dad came back from the hospital long enough to try to eat the holiday dinner with us (my brothers and me and aunts and uncle)-and he sat next to the telephone. The call came and Dad told us the baby had arrived-a boy- and he hurried back to the hospital. I was ten at the time and boy or girl was exciting and great to me, and you brothers didn\u2019t complain. Wendy was loved from that very start, truly a thanksgiving.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Mom brought him home, and I remember I sat down in a big chair and Mom put this little bundle in my folded arms.\u00a0 Believe it or not he was so tiny and cuddly that\u00a0 I doubt anyone could anticipate his future height or distinguished\u00a0 career.\u00a0 I don\u2019t remember him having curly hair then, but\u00a0 I will always remember his spectacular,\u00a0 beautiful golden curls, and the later picture of him on his tricycle with a crown of those curls.\u00a0 You may have seen it, if not, be sure to look for it. This tiny warm sweet baby\u00a0 was to become an outstanding dentist , a school board president staying his ground for what he felt was right, a president of Rotary Club local state and national recognition\u00a0 following Dad and his brothers footsteps and a leader to emulate. Art and I were honored when he asked us for a possible location for the annual Rotary Club conference.\u00a0 We\u00a0 could not help beyond what he already\u00a0 knew. He seldom left a stone unturned in his activities.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then there were the days of trying to find out what made him cry so much while Mom and Dad were carrying and walking with him night after night. It finally was found to be a hernia and surgery followed. The days he tolerated then must have been the start of his congeniality and patience, even under stress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So let me jump years ahead.\u00a0 He took Art and me fishing\u00a0 and he had hooked a musky on his line.\u00a0 As he got it up close to the boat I tried to net it\u00a0 and\u00a0 couldn\u2019t quite reach.\u00a0 Art joined the maneuver just as the musky went under and on the other side of the boat.\u00a0 You fishermen know that is not good news.\u00a0 The musky disappeared, not quietly either.\u00a0 \u201cOh Wendy,\u00a0 I\u2019m SO sorry\u201d,I said, as I was about to cry. Without a pause or blame he said\u00a0 \u201cNo problem\u201d as if it was an everyday issue (like one blue sock was missing from the laundry).\u00a0 He frequently used that phrase \u201cno problem\u201d which you must have heard. Years later I learned\u00a0 he had not caught a musky before.\u00a0 I would feel better if one of you\u00a0 know he eventually caught a musky (which he would probably release.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Back to the charming baby boy. I must have thought he was a pest at times, and I was told I did considerable babysitting, but I don\u2019t remember either. We probably were playing together, peek -a-boo-or walking outside in his baby buggy, and I was not \u201csitting\u201d. He was really cute and I had the pleasure of being big sister (as well a little sister).<\/p>\n\n\n\n
He was having problems reading and eventually it was discovered he was seeing letters backwards (I believe) Again patiently he worked to strengthen the weaker eye muscles both at the clinic and at home. Mom began to tutor him so he could keep up. That too continued at the dining room table a long time. I didn\u2019t hear him complain nor did Mom.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So he started\u00a0 a number of hobbies.\u00a0 Oh my, did he ever. First was setting up the garage so he could\u00a0 raise pigeons. I can imagine why that was ended!\u00a0 Then there was some attempt to raise ducks, I think. Next came Rev. Rognlie, our church minister, who\u00a0 brought\u00a0 him a clock to take apart for fun. No, it did not get put back together.\u00a0 \u201cno problem.\u201d\u00a0 Our minister\u00a0 (married to a cousin in the Rovelstad\u00a0 family), would\u00a0 frequently drop in around noon, visit at the dining table until we finished eating or sit\u00a0 in the living room smoking a cigar with Dad.\u00a0\u00a0 Then one day\u00a0 Rev. Rognlie brought Wendy a tray\u00a0 of baby chicks!!\u00a0 The chicks took over the pigeons quarters and grew and grew.\u00a0 It became a real challenge to locate the rooster that crowed in the morning so he wasn\u2019t there the next morning.\u00a0 However I don\u2019t remember Wendy being up early to find which one. The noise would have carried\u00a0 far enough to wake up\u00a0 the neighbors!\u00a0 There were some wild times with those chickens, and yes, we had \u201cchicken every Sunday\u201d\u00a0 I got into the act when the grocery was closed\u00a0 as usual on\u00a0 Wed. afternoon and\u00a0 I had promised a chicken dinner for a friend that night and nobody else was at home (enough said).\u00a0 So help me I wonder if Wendy or my big brothers knew about some of these antics.\u00a0 Again I can guess why the chickens\u00a0 vacated their home, the fenced yard area and garage.\u00a0 No, it didn\u2019t end there, because then came a special duck he named Gwendolyn that followed behind him wherever he went. This was a blessing to this boy when he got polio.\u00a0 Wendy was hospitalized at a nearby hospital and Gordy\u00a0 would take Gwendolyn to the sidewalk below Wendy\u2019s second floor window so they could \u201ctalk\u201d? Didn\u2019t you also have something in common with your interest in birds and his in chickens, Gordy?\u00a0 I know you had an oven bird\u2019s nest in the haven of\u00a0 our by then famous garage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Polio really kept him down a long time and with a lot of anxiety about the future. With patience he got through it and certainly didn\u2019t ever forget the episode.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Next, Gordy, you could better tell of Wendy\u2019s part in Marge Biersachs junior high class play. I just don\u2019t remember seeing it. Wendy would be upset if he knew I quoted a bit of the Elgin newspaper write up, but he would know I would anyway! Big sisters aren\u2019t always so great. Besides Ginny sent the clipping to me-surely not just for a scrapbook! It read \u201c\u2026while little Wendell Rovelstad, who played the part of Peter, baby of the family, was adorable .He did not need to play a part- he was just a little boy being himself, even though he had lines to memorize and remembered them perfectly.\u201d Gordy, you will have to tell more about this as well as the review which farther on included \u201c\u2026..Gordon Rovelstad made an excellent impression in the role of Tom Hamilton, who inherited the Carey house, but solved the problem of letting them keep it\u2026..\u201d Good brothers, yes?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Bud, weren\u2019t you in college through some of this? I know Wendy was close to you and you and he talked a lot, even more so when he was older. Actually you were a wonderful tender loving big brother for both Wendy and myself. During some of this time you were in the army and sent to Germany. And Gordy, you and Wendy were true buddies particularly with your mutual involvement at Northwestern U Dental school and plans of his dental future with Dad in Elgin. Incidentally Gordy, you were on the picture I had by my desk in college. It is still visible in an old photograph of that desk. Wendy (and I) felt we had the best big brothers in the world. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
One of the more painful times in Wendy\u2019s life was the loss of Dad. It was a major loss for our whole family. It seemed not fair that he lost his life caring for an indigent ,off the street, alcoholic patient with hepatitis B.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Protection was not stressed in those days and Dad was always a professional dentist and actively cared about people needing help. Dad\u2019s concern for others was certainly typical through out Wendy\u2019s life. You would have a hard time finding otherwise. Wendy began trying to readjust to the major change in his hopes and plans, and the following years were very difficult. Mom tried to fill some of his need for Dad and provided him a lot of emotional support. To top it off, his dentist big brother Gordy was called back to service and sent to Korea. Bud was in Germany and I was married and in Arkansas. The situations were stressful for most of the families and difficult to be much help to Wendy. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now it is important that you and Bud provide your versions of these early but especially later times with Wendy. If you don\u2019t I will be obliged to tell what I remember about each of you when we were kids.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Gwendolyn eventually moved to a loving family on a farm. But— there was another special pet! I\u2019m not sure just when the black Scotty dog entered our family. Apparently, I was not as involved because I can\u2019t remember his name, but I vaguely remember him chasing the chicken or duck. Maybe that was a movie, though these old scenes could be a real movie all its own. He was Wendy\u2019s companion for many years, and eventually a another loss for him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Later, Art and I talked about where to retire and had hoped to choose the same place as Wendy and Ginny. Wendy selected some options as we both did and the four of us set out in the car to investigate the towns and facilities- from Indiana to North Carolina and in between. We tried to sort out the negatives and positives with difficulty. Wendy and Ginny chose to move to Phoenix. We were undecided – eventually<\/p>\n\n\n\n
moving to Ann Arbor-supposedly a less congested area and excellent activities for those not so young . We both had good reasons for our choices. However we were living farther apart than ever. We did get to Manitowish with them at the lake, at times. Wendy took us in his boat sightseeing all the connected chain of lakes. Art and he got together with hammers and paint brushes for a variety of fun (per Art) projects. He also was fun to window shop with me and answer my request for his opinion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Our earlier traveling together was great, and I\u2019ll never forget one time in Florida. Wendy suggested I come up with something unusual to do like we had in the past, but not weird. Because Art and I had gathered crabs out of the Chesapeake Bay when the tide went out and cooked them on the sandy beach the idea intrigued us. We quickly stopped the car and bought Blue crabs without the slightest idea what to do with them or where, nor do I remember what we did. Another moment I haven\u2019t forgotten was looking at some Norwegian enamel gifts and Wendy somehow bought and surprised me with a neat sail boat pin. It has been a special treasure for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But oh! the memorable situation we all refer to was a holiday when many of us were busy getting dinner ready. Likely following aunt Ida up to the attic, (attics were big in those houses) Wendy discovered a box of \u201cchocolates\u201d that tasted wonderful. No one knew how many he had eaten when he showed what was left in the box which said EXLAX . I t was a sample box commonly sent to dentists and must have been mixed in with other \u201cstuff\u201d stored from Dad\u2019s office. There was a lot of scurrying to get him to the hospital to have his stomach pumped! I\u2019m told Wendy tells the story a little different and he was the victim so I won\u2019t challenge it.. He never forgot the day nor did we. Anyone remember what happened to dinner?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I have written enough of life at home with Wendy who was never passive ,always patient, quiet ,tolerant and a wonderful brother. He worked hard and met every challenge and was a highly respected and loved leader and part of our family. His mischief seemed to be unintentional and didn\u2019t increase his self confidence. I\u2019m not sure he knew how much people and we loved him. Even years later his patients would come up to me to tell me how wonderful he was. I definitely agreed. The years later- such as schooling, marriage, a job selling ElectroLux vacuum cleaners -someone else can tell all the grandchildren. Of course I could go on and on but these are some of the events I recall . Sure did love the guy!!!!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sister of Wendy ,Gord and Bud(Randy)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Aunt of their children Great aunt down the line<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Friend of many of Wendy\u2019s friends as he so kindly included Art and myself <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dorothy<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
January 7, 2004 DEAR FAMILY: There were some days in the life of my brother, Wendy, that you may have missed , particularly grandchildren and others who had left home for college etc. Some events , you older brothers may recall and refresh and correct my memory. For starters it was Wendy\u2019s debut that Thanksgiving … Continue reading Wendy – My Brother (Eulogy from Dorothy Nesse)<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":112,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"footnotes":""},"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/813"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=813"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/813\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":814,"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/813\/revisions\/814"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/112"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nesse.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=813"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}